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Thursday, February 6, 2020

My Favorite Quotes About Motherhood

In a moment of mixed excitement and sadness that my last pregnancy is slowly coming to a close, I gathered all of my favorite quotes on motherhood that reflect what I've always thought but couldn't always so eloquently say. Talk about every single emotion being balled up and shoved into one person: struggle, gratitude, exhaustion, happiness, anxiety, love. There's nothing quite as complex as giving life and taking care of it, and then wondering if you're doing it well enough. Welcome to motherhood.



1. "Love me when I least deserve it because that is when I need it the most." -Swedish Proverb 

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 So, so true on this one, especially for our oldest orchid child--sensitive, anxious, and in need of reassurance. This saying always comes to mind with him and I try my best to remember it.

2. "The funny thing about kids is, they are the reason we lose it, and the reason we hold it together." --unknown

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The latter part of this has held true during my miscarriages, during the loss of my grandparents, and for any hard times that we've had to navigate--always so thankful for their laughter and light.

3. "I swear I couldn’t love you more than I do right now, yet I know I will tomorrow." --Leo Christopher

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 This reminds me of my newborns and the journey of watching them grow. Also such a good reminder that THERE IS MORE ahead as babies develop into toddlers, and toddlers change into little people with big thoughts and words.

4. "Speak to your children as if they are the wisest, kindest, most beautiful and magical humans on earth, for what they believe is what they will become." --Brooke Hampton
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 We're big on affirmations in our house, and there is true power in words. What they say out loud, they will begin to believe. I'm sure of it.

 5. "Being a mother is learning about strengths you didn't know you had, and dealing with fears you didn't know existed." --Linda Wooten

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Never would I have thought I could endure years of interrupted sleep, or be deathly afraid of Influenza (or worse), or brokenhearted about my kids feeling excluded, or an advocate for them to the point that I'd move heaven and earth to make them happy. That's motherhood.


6."Making a decision to have a child--it's momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking outside your body." --Elizabeth Stone
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Nothing more to add here, other than it's 100% accurate.

7. "And she loved a little boy very very much--even more than she loved herself."--Shel Silverstein
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I'm partial to this one, of course, but it couldn't remind me any more of my two boys.

8. "How they were raised is how they will love."--unknown
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Sensitivity, vulnerability, reversing stereotypical gender roles, and lots and lots of words of affirmation and love: these are what we try to personify for our 4 little eyes that are watching.


9. "If you want to change the world, go home and love your family." --Mother Theresa
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Some of our most important work will happen inside of our house, and raising two (soon to be 3) kind little people is more important than so much else of what takes up our days.

10. "My identify rests solely and firmly on this: I am my mother’s daughter."

 
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Her story will always be where yours began. 













 



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Thursday, January 30, 2020

The Most Recommended Amazon Clothing Finds by More Than 14,000 Women

Today I'm sharing the results of one of the most commented on threads I've seen in a Facebook group of over 14,000 women: everybody's favorite Amazon clothing find.  Amazon clothing is notoriously hit or miss, so getting a recommendation or a seal of approval before ordering is always helpful. I summarized the MOST discussed or submitted items, below, and also included some honorable mentions later on. So many good finds--if only I wasn't 8 months pregnant! Adding to cart and saving for later, ladidaa.



Quarter Zip Hoodie: the kind of thing I live in

High Waisted Yoga Pants: SO many votes for these, which also come in lots of fun colors. They’re supposed to be a dupe for the super pricey Lululemon Align leggings.

Turtleneck Sweater with Asymmetric Hem

Long Sleeved Belted Dress: Great for a dressier occasion. Stretchy and low maintenance, with no ironing or dry cleaning required.
 
Textured Turtleneck Sweater

Romper

Mock Neck Cozy Sweater

Lace Dress: So pretty for weddings, baptisms, showers, etc. 

Twist Knot Front Tunic: SO many votes for this one, too!

Jeans: Person submitting these as a favorite said, “I’m obsessed with these and they come in almost any color/style imaginable.”

Stretchy V-Neck Tee

Cuffed Ring

Cloud Foam Tennis Shoes

Tortoise Shell Earrings

Fedora: cute, warm, and adjustable in size.

Other honorable mentions: Casual Oversized Crewneck Pullover, Open Front Kimono Cardigan, Coziest Pajamas, Off the Shoulder Jumpsuit.


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Wednesday, January 29, 2020

How I Knew We Needed a Third Baby


The question that gets brought up to me most these days: “How did you make the decision to have a 3rd baby?”. Or, said another way by those not as subtle (most recently by my hair dresser), “Was this baby an accident?” Lovely phrasing aside, I’m here to tell you how we know that three is our number, and why not less, and why not more.

I think the biggest misconception is that we’re totally killing the parenting game and decided to add one more since we’re on auto pilot over here. This is definitely not the case, and our days hold plenty of parenting and work/life balance challenges. The boys fight just as much as they get along, and there is a lot of patience, grace, and love that is required to navigate the uncharted waters of parenting our 5 and 3 year old boys. Our lives have also always included international travel, which sometimes feels like an insurmountable feat with two—let alone three--littles. Matt and I have been able to divide and conquer (or something very minimally resembling it) with two kids until now, and thinking ahead to how we’ll be able to travel with three kids, and all that that entails (cost, car seats, sleeping arrangements, rental cars) is enough to completely overwhelm me. So what the heck are we doing?

The shortest and easiest answer is simply this:  I just didn’t feel like we were done. The thought of completely moving on from this phase of life, as intense as it is, with the baby years in the rear view mirror, got to me more and more as we continued to celebrate birthdays for the boys. For a little while, I thought that maybe I was just one of those people that would never want to stop, always craving a newborn in her arms as a way to try to freeze time. It’s really hard to grow up. It’s painful to have to move on to the next chapter. It’s hard to stop dreaming and buying pregnancy tests, hard to give up that exciting and nervous high that makes your stomach flip-flop, hard to stop imagining the future with little people that you’ve never met yet. As it turns out, the moment I first saw this baby on an ultrasound was also the one where I knew that this would be the last time. I knew that our future was now going to be spent taking care of these three babies that we had been given, and I felt an overwhelming sense of completion. I feel like we anxiously gambled and ended up with healthy pregnancies and babies, three for three (my miscarriages aside). I knew that this baby was the missing piece to our family, and now that we had her, it was all I ever wanted. I just couldn’t ever fathom asking the universe to give us even more.

Another reason why we decided to have a third baby is for our boys. The gift of a sibling, a best friend, trumped any back-of-the-mind concerns on how we would afford college tuition for three kids. Oskar, especially, had been asking for a baby for a long time, and seeing his excitement bubble over with every pregnancy milestone and doctor’s appointment he’s tagged along to validates our decision tenfold.  The classic, “How do you want your Thanksgiving table to look in 20 years?” question also resonated with me, and the choice to give our boys another person to love was honestly made with my heart instead of my head in many ways. 

Finally, I never went into August’s pregnancy thinking it was my final time to experience it. Parenting a 21 month old and a newborn, I learned, allows for little time to slow down and relish in the “lasts”…my last newborn, last time nursing, last first words, last first holidays. To be honest, I existed in survival mode for well over a year after August came along, and never got to really hold on to it, enjoy it, then let it go. I ached to be able to do that, just one more time, and am so grateful that I now have that chance.

The same way I intuitively knew we needed just one more baby is likely the same way I know that this will be our last. I know that this is the perfect number for us, for our finances, for the way we want to live our lives, for our mental well being…for my patience, sanity, and amount that I’m able to extend myself. I want to work, we want to travel. I think, and hope, we can still swing it with just one more addition to our family. 

I know lots of people struggle with this very same question—are we done having babies? Finality is a tricky thing. My best advice is this: if you don’t know, do nothing. I think the answer will make its way to you in time. For us, three is it. Both my head AND heart know it this time, which is just about the happiest you can feel.
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Tuesday, January 21, 2020

Hospital Packing Checklist and What you Really Need

Hello my friends! For those of you currently pregnant, I put together my tried and true hospital packing checklist and what to make sure to take with you when you're having a baby. Since this is my third go-around, I feel like I have this list nailed down pat, as well as pared WAY down to what my must-haves really are. Example: no need to bring a novel to read, cus #nobodygottimeforthat. I also made a printable version, here, so you can stick this to your fridge and check things off as you get closer and closer to go-time. Or, the image is pin-able, so if you want to save it and reference back that way, that works as well. The hospital really does have all of your basics, including diapers, wipes, baby bath essentials, onesies, hats, swaddles, perineal spray/peri bottles, nipple cream, pads, etc. Nearly all of what I list, below, truly are either comfort items or what I've found to be personal preference, so know that if you show up without something, you'll still be just fine. I like to have my bag fully packed by 36 weeks (except for last minute items to grab, like phone chargers and wallets, of course), and prefer something that wheels to make it that much easier to haul since triage feels like miles away when you're in active labor. Always such an exciting and surreal feeling to start gathering everything together--one step closer to meeting your baby and becoming a mama (for some of you, again). There's nothing like it. I hope this is helpful, and if there's something that YOU find to be a must-have that isn't included, let me know!


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